


Crash and Burn

by DimensionTripperHomura



Series: Let It Burn [5]
Category: Love Live! School Idol Project
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-01
Updated: 2018-03-24
Packaged: 2019-02-26 00:26:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 13,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13224369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DimensionTripperHomura/pseuds/DimensionTripperHomura
Summary: Summary: Sort of a prequel to LIB in F!Honoka’s timeline, going further into the dynamics of Honoka’s relationship with Eli and Kotori and the ordeals Future Muse went through from Umi’s betrayal to Honoka’s time in the camp and Arisa’s death.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys enjoy!

The first thing Honoka realized when she began to wake up was that she was somewhere a lot warmer than she was used to. Over the past months she’d gotten used to being cold a lot of the time. Not only that but she was lying on something soft. Not the hard mattress of the bed in her cell, nor the cold, uncomfortable steel of the doctor’s table either. 

Her eyes flew open in surprise and she jolted up, finding herself in a dimly lit room she didn’t recognize. She was lying on the floor, on a futon that had been rolled out for her. 

“Honoka-chan…”

Honoka flinched in surprise as someone touched her arm. She quickly reared back, pushing herself with her hands and feet so that she could scurry back to the wall behind her. “G-G-Get away from me!”

Kotori shifted to her knees, a pained look on her face but she didn’t try to move forward after Honoka. “Honoka-chan, it’s just me. It’s Kotori.”

Honoka shook her head. “No.” She said through gritted teeth. She remembered running as far from the camp as she could but she’d tried escaping before only to be rewarded with hallucinations and dreams like this. She slid her fingers into her hair and gripped hard. “You’re not real, it’s a t-trick.”

“I am real.” Kotori tentatively shuffled forward but hesitated when Honoka whimpered and shook her head. Pausing for a moment she took a moment to look Honoka over. She was a lot thinner than she used to be, that was obvious. Under the long shirt she’d dressed Honoka in she could see the cut across Honoka’s chest itching out. She’d stitched and bandaged it as best she could but they didn’t have anyone with medical knowledge there so they hadn’t been able to do much else with it. 

She bit the inside of her cheek hard as tears pricked at her eyes. She didn’t know whether Maki or the other first years were even alive. The last she’d heard of Maki was when she, along with Rin and Hanayo had been running from Akihabara all those months ago. She’d been scared, Kotori remembered with a tight feeling in her chest. The last thing Kotori had heard from her was her crying out Rin’s name before the connection had been broken. Though none of them wanted to say it, they were certain something bad had happened to Rin. 

She quickly shook her head, trying to focus. Honoka was muttering to herself under her breath, rocking back and forward slightly with her hands in her hair. Kotori didn’t know what to do to help her so she did the only thing she could think of. 

“Nozomi-chan!”

She didn’t have to wait more than a few seconds before she heard footsteps behind her followed by a sharp intake of breath. “Honoka-chan?!”

“She woke up a few minutes ago but I-I don’t know what to do.” Kotori looked up, feeling a strong hand briefly touch her shoulder. 

“It’s okay, let me try.” Nozomi said soothingly. She crouched down, moving slowly toward Honoka who wasn’t paying much attention to her anyway. 

“She’s awake?”

Kotori looked toward the doorway at the sound of Eli’s voice. “She woke up a few minutes ago.” She said again, her voice soft. “I-I didn’t know what to do and Nozomi is better at this than anyone else…”

Eli nodded in response. As much as she wanted to burst into the room and rush to Honoka herself, Nozomi was the best person to make the approach toward the clearly traumatised girl. 

“It’s okay, I’m not going to hurt you.” Nozomi soothed gently as Honoka’s eyes darted up to her face. “It’s just me.”

Honoka’s eyes brimmed with tears as she watched Nozomi get closer to her. “N-Nozomi-chan…”

Nozomi gave a slight smile as Honoka uttered her name. “Yeah.” She said, her voice slightly choked with emotion. They’d been searching for Honoka for so long, ever since she’d been taken all those months ago. She gently set her hand on Honoka’s arm and focused on using her ability to calm the girl. “Can you tell me what happened?”

“I-I was taken t-to a camp. Testing…” Honoka shook her head quickly. “I-I tried to escape but U-Umi-chan…”

Nozomi felt Honoka’s panic spike once more and carefully used her ability to calm Honoka further. “What happened to Umi-chan, Honoka-chan? Do you know where she is? Was she in the camp with you?”

Honoka shook her head once more. “S-She did this…” She tugged down the collar of her shirt to reveal the white bandages. 

Kotori inhaled sharply at the suggestion. “W-Why would she do that? What happened?”

“I thought she was helping me escape but she slashed at me with her katana.” Honoka answered easily, Nozomi’s power calming her. “She tried to kill me.”

Flames flickered at Eli’s fingers. “She’s taking their side then?”

“I-I don’t know…”

“Enough questions, Honoka-chan needs to rest.” Nozomi said, slowly getting to her feet. She slowly lessened her power until she wasn’t using at all. Honoka trembled visibly but she didn’t seem as frantic as a few minutes ago. Nozomi glance to Kotori who looked suddenly pale. “Will you be okay with her?”

“Uh...yeah. Of course.”

“We’ll be right outside if you need us.” Nozomi said softly before she walked over to Eli. She gripped her flaming hand and tugged her out of the room, into the kitchen. “Calm down, Elichi.”

“Calm down?!” Eli exclaimed in exasperation. “Did you hear what Honoka just said? Umi…”

“We don’t know anything yet. She might just be confused.” Nozomi interrupted pointedly. “She barely knew who we were. Just give her some time to wake up properly. She’s been out cold for weeks. I’ll talk to her again later, just go and find Arisa-chan and Yukiho-chan, please. Yukiho-chan will want to know Honoka-chan’s awake.”

Eli looked like she wanted to argue but instead she huffed and walked away. 

Nozomi sighed in relief. She understood where Eli was coming from. She was furious at the idea of Umi hurting Honoka too but they couldn’t rush in without thinking first. She watched as the blonde disappeared around the corner at the end of the hallway. Eli had always been protective of Honoka but since they’d gotten her back she’d been frantic. While Kotori was the one who stayed at Honoka’s side, Eli was checking on her constantly, wanting to make sure nothing had changed for the worse like she’d expected it to.

Deciding to get some rest herself, Nozomi warily made her way to the room she was sharing with Eli. Since the virus had been released and taken out most of the population of non-ability users, Muse had been on the run, struggling to stay ahead of CORPS and the governments so they wouldn’t be captured while also trying to find their lost friends. So far they’d only been able to find Honoka. The first years were still missing. 

She lay down on her futon with a groan of annoyance and buried her face in her pillow. She could only hope that Honoka really was confused. That she was just mixing names up in her head as she tried to recount what had happened. Umi wouldn’t hurt Honoka. Nozomi was confident of that, having sensed Umi’s feelings for Honoka a long time ago. She wasn’t sure what she would do if she was wrong about Umi. 

\-----

Honoka was huddled up in her futon, trying to get warm when she heard the door open behind her. She tensed, waiting with bated breath as she listened to someone enter. She wondered if it was Kotori. Her girlfriend had left a short while ago, on a supply run, she had said. 

“Honoka?” Eli’s voice sounded in a whisper and Honoka let herself relax, just slightly. “Are you awake?”

Honoka closed her eyes tightly, hoping that Eli would leave her alone. She didn’t want to talk about what had happened. 

Eli sighed softly and shuffled over to the futon. She sat down next to it and drew her knees to her chest as she looked over to Honoka. “She did it, didn’t she? Nozomi says we should wait and find out what’s going on but I don’t need to. I don’t want to waste time when I could be hunting her down.”

Eli’s words were hard and angry and the meaning behind them set Honoka on edge but the warmth that radiated from the blonde soothed her. 

“I hate her.” Eli mumbled after a moment, her voice a little defeated this time. “I hate that she did this…”

Honoka felt Eli’s fingers graze against her bandage and her hand shot up, closing around Eli’s wrist. She opened her eyes in time to catch shock flash across Honoka’s face. 

“D-Don’t.” Honoka stuttered, quickly releasing Eli’s wrist. “Don’t touch it.”

“I thought you were asleep.” Eli said, her cheeks turning red with embarrassment. She drew her hand back to her own chest. “Sorry, I was just...sorry. It won’t happen again.” She looked away, guilt ebbing at her. “Um...where’s Kotori?”

She knew, of course, but she was trying to change the subject. 

“I don’t know.” Honoka said simply, staring at Eli. 

“Right. Um...has Yukiho come by?” Eli asked awkwardly, barely able to meet Honoka’s eyes. 

“F-For a while.” Honoka replied, clutching her blankets closer to her chest. “She left already.”

“Right.” Eli muttered softly. She was silent for a moment before she spoke again. “Is it okay if I stay here, for a while. We don’t have to talk, I just want to stay close to you if that’s okay.”

“Y-Yeah, okay.” Honoka whispered, turning onto her side to face Eli. “Will you stay with me t-tonight? Kotori-chan said they might not be back until morning i-if they have to travel too far…”

“Of course. Whatever you need.” Eli hesitated though, unsure as to what Honoka wanted her to do. 

Honoka shuffled backwards, to the edge of her futon. “Y-You can get in if you want to, j-just don’t touch me too much.”

Eli nodded and slowly slipped into the futon with Honoka. She kept her distance as she’d promised, waiting for Honoka to tell her what to do. 

“I-It was always cold in the camp.” Honoka spoke up after a moment. “Sometimes I-I couldn’t s-sleep because I was shaking s-so much.”

Eli’s heart wrenched at Honoka’s stutter. It was like the usually confident girl was afraid, even now. 

“You’re so warm.” Honoka whispered, inching her hand toward Eli. “Will you hold my hand? Please? I-I don’t want to be alone.”

“You’re not alone.” Eli gripped Honoka’s hand between them, noticing her eyes brimming with moisture. “I’m here, Honoka.”

\-----

“I don’t suppose you told your girlfriend where you were going?”

Kotori shot Nico an annoyed glare as they paced down the deserted street. “Shut up, Nico-chan. You better not tell her.”

Nico smirked, rolling her eyes. “Why would I?” She paused for a couple of seconds before continuing, her voice softer this time. “How is she anyway?”

“Not good.” Kotori heaved a sigh and looked around. “This would be easier if Rin-chan was here.”

“Well that’s why we’re out looking for them.” Nico pointed out, raising an eyebrow. Kotori seemed a lot more on edge than usual. She was too, of course, given that Maki and the others were missing but Kotori seemed especially anxious. She put it down to what had happened to Honoka. “I don’t know where they could have gone.”

“I don’t either.” Kotori stopped abruptly, planting her hands on her hips as she looked around. They’d been looking for weeks now and they didn’t seem to be getting any closer to finding the missing first years. “We’ve covered all of this before. If they were coming back they would have found us by now and we can’t go looking for them without transport. This is a waste of time!” She kicked angrily at an open magazine lying at her feet. The streets were a mess now, with nobody to take care of them. “We’re never going to find them!”

“Whoa, calm down…” Nico said, taken aback by Kotori’s anger. “Of course we’ll find them. One way or another.”

“You mean dead or alive.” Kotori’s voice was strained, her hands closed into fists at her sides. “Because you know Maki-chan would have contacted us by now if she could. And Rin-chan would have come for us.”

Nico chose not to answer that. “Just what the hell is your connection to Maki anyway? It’s like the two of you know each other. Not that it seems like you were friends, I mean…”

“That’s none of your damn business.” Kotori snapped, frustrated that she couldn’t do anything for the first years. Or Honoka, for that matter. “We just need to find them, okay? We need to find a way to get out of this town so we can look for them properly.”

Nico crossed her arms in front of her chest. “We’d be gone for days. How would you explain that to Honoka?”

“I don’t care!” Kotori exclaimed loudly. She cringed at the way that sounded. “I don’t mean that, I just...I can’t do anything to help Honoka now either. She just wants Nozomi and I can’t DO anything for her.”

“Or Maki.” Nico quipped. 

“Would you fucking STOP bringing her up?!” Kotori growled angrily. She remembered Maki when she was a kid. Despite being tough, Maki could be a crybaby at times. Kotori knew that from experience. She would be scared now, that was certain. Or dead. Kotori didn’t want to picture either of those things. She stalked further up the street. “Let’s just keep going. We’ll figure this out later.”

Nico sighed and followed Kotori though if she was honest, she didn’t see the point. Kotori was right. They wouldn’t find the first years like this. “What if they really are dead?”

Kotori’s step faltered as icy panic ran down her spine. “Don’t say that.”

“Why not? Everyone’s thinking it. Even Nozomi thinks they’re dead.” Nico’s eyes widened as Kotori swung around to face her. “I don’t want it to be true either, you know. Maki’s…” She sighed, rolling her eyes briefly skyward. “Forget about it. You wouldn’t understand.”

Kotori stared hard at Nico. “She’s my friend too.”

“She’s my best friend.” Nico argued, frowning at the thought. It was true enough that she was closer to Maki than she was to any of the others. Even Nozomi. “You have your best friend here.”

“My best friend just STABBED my girlfriend!” Kotori cried out in exasperation. “And she’s nowhere to be found so we can’t even ask her WHY she did it. How does it sound like I have it easy? Look, let’s just keep going. I don’t want to give up yet.”

Nico wisely decided that she should stay quiet, at least about Maki. Biting her lip, she followed Kotori along the street, making sure to stay alert in case any agents showed up. 

\----

Nozomi had expected Eli to stay with Honoka for a while but when she woke up and looked over at the clock, noticing it was three in the morning she grew a little concerned. She slid out of bed and walked to Honoka’s bedroom, pausing in the doorway. A slight smile flitted to her lips when she spotted Honoka and Eli huddled in the futon, their hands clasped between them. 

She leaned against the doorframe, crossing her arms in front of her chest as she watched them. It was clear that Honoka was fast asleep but she knew that Eli wasn’t. The blonde just hadn’t noticed her yet, given that she was facing away from the door. 

Feeling a slight tug at her heart, she lifted her hand to her chest. They weren’t her feelings, she knew, but Eli’s. It hurt Eli more than she would show that Honoka had been hurt, especially by someone who was meant to be their friend. Someone Eli had cared for at one point. 

Nozomi cleared her throat and Eli glanced quickly over her shoulder, relaxing at the sight of her. 

“I-I wasn’t doing anything.” Eli said, keeping her voice to a whisper so as not to wake Honoka up. “I was just watching her sleep.”

“I know.” Nozomi smirked and pointed to her own chest. “You know I can feel you. Whether I want to or not.”

Eli blushed at the comment. “Right. Uh...sorry. It wasn’t...I mean it’s not…”

“I know, I know.” Nozomi said with a roll of her eyes. Eli’s feelings for Honoka were something they had discussed before but Eli had dismissed it as just a crush. Nozomi didn’t believe her but she hardly felt like it mattered. She knew that Eli wouldn’t act on her feelings. She certainly wouldn’t cheat on her or leave her. “How is she?”

“Scared.” Eli answered softly, relieved that Nozomi had changed the subject. “I can’t believe Kotori left her like this.”

“Kotori-chan knows she can’t help Honoka-chan right now. She needs to keep busy, to feel useful.” Nozomi explained with a slight shake of her head. Sometimes she couldn’t help but feel that Eli saw things in black and white too much. “Besides, we still have to find Maki-chan and the others.”

“Or their bodies.” Eli mumbled darkly. “They’re probably dead. You know that. You can’t connect with them either, can you?”

Nozomi hesitated. Eli was right. Since Maki, Rin and Hanayo had left she hadn’t been able to feel them. She was hoping that was just because they weren’t close enough for her to sense them. “My ability is weaker now. After Kotori-chan and I got caught in the fog after the virus…”

Eli grimaced. She still felt guilty that she hadn’t been there but she had left the school before Nozomi to get to Arisa. “We should still be prepared. Just in case.”

“Something tells me nothing’s going to prepare Kotori-chan and Nicocchi for that…”

“What?”

“Nothing. Nevermind.” Nozomi shook her head, brushing Eli’s question off. “Are you going to stay here for the night?”

Eli nodded her head. “You could stay if you want. You’d be better at this than I am.”

Nozomi smiled softly but shook her head. “Honoka-chan needs you right now, Elichi. She trusts you. She knows you’ll protect her.”

“W-What do you mean by that?”

Nozomi nodded at Eli’s hand, still gripped by Honoka’s. “She hasn’t let anyone else touch her since she woke up, you know? She only let me because I was calming her down. Other than that she doesn’t want to be touched. I think you should stay with her. She obviously feels safer when you’re around.”

“Did you get that from your empathy?”

Nozomi gave a soft laugh and shook her head. “I just know my friends well. Especially you and Honoka. The best thing you can do right now is stay with her while you can. I’ll be in our bedroom if you need me.”

Eli nodded and watched as Nozomi turned and left the room. Sighing to herself, she turned back to Honoka and reached up with her free hand, brushing her fingers against the younger girl’s cheek. “I’m not going anywhere.”

\-------

Umi screamed out in pain as her mother slashed at her arms with the blade she held in her hand. There was no denying that her mother was skilled with a blade. Kasumi knew where to cut so as not to kill Umi but to inflict serious pain. Umi had tried to stay silent but her arms were throbbing and she felt faint with blood loss. Her arms, hung above her head throbbed with intense pain that seemed to never stop. She’d thought she might stop feeling it eventually but that hadn’t been the case. 

“YOU LET HER ESCAPE!” Kasumi yelled, outraged. “YOU PURPOSEFULLY ALLOWED THE INVISIBLE GIRL TO TAKE KOUSAKA! YOU PLANNED THIS WITH HER, DIDN’T YOU?!”

Umi shook her head only to receive another fierce slash as punishment. The tears that streaked down her cheeks fell to the floor, mixing with the blood dripping from her arms. 

“I should just tag you.” Kasumi growled. “Then you would obey me. Just like Kousaka.”

“I would never obey you.” Umi rasped out. She heard a sharp intake of her breath from her mother and looked up, meeting her eyes. Behind Kasumi at the other end of the room, A-Rise stood, watching her. “I would die for Honoka. That’s why I’m here, isn’t it? You said Honoka would be safe if I joined you. As long as you hold up your end of the deal, I’ll do as you ask.”

Kasumi gritted her teeth. She had said that. It seemed to be the only way to keep Umi on side. To keep up appearances. “This won’t go unpunished. I’ll leave you in the hands of Tsubasa.” She glanced over at Tsubasa, Erena and Anju. “Make sure she learns her lesson. But don’t kill her.”

“Yes, Sonoda-san.” Erena answered when it became apparent that the other two wouldn’t. Tsubasa despised the woman speaking to them and Anju was too busy finding amusement in Umi’s pain. 

Kasumi left the room, leaving Umi with the three girls. As Anju approached, Umi weakly lifted her head and let out a scoff. “As if you could hurt me more than she already has. You’re not allowed to kill me, remember?”

“Maybe not.” Anju smirked. “But physical pain isn’t the only wait to torture someone.” She passed her hand in front of her face and shapeshifted into the leader of Muse. “What do you think?”

Umi’s eyes widened briefly before she quickly looked away. “Change back.”

Anju gripped Umi’s chin, forcing her to look at her. “Why, Umi-chan? I thought you wanted to see me. You were saying so before, remember? Crying out my name in your sleep.”

Umi growled in anger and tried to lunge forward only to be stopped by the chains around her wrists. “Go to hell.”

“You said you would die for me earlier.” Anju observed in Honoka’s voice, her tone amused. “I don’t know why. I love Kotori-chan, not you. You’re a traitor. You tried to kill me.”

Umi’s lower lip trembled. She knew it was Anju and that it was an act but she couldn’t hear that in Honoka’s voice without responding. “I had to play the part, I’m sorry. I wanted to keep you safe. And now I’ve fucked up…She knows my hand.”

“And so do I.” Anju taunted, smirking as tears spilled from Umi’s eyes. “Poor Umi-chan, so in love with someone who doesn’t love her back. You’re starving for love. Which is why you’re still here, with mommy. Not that she’ll ever love you either.”

Tsubasa growled. “Enough, Anju.”

Anju rolled her eyes but stepped back. “Fine. But we’ll be continuing this conversation later.” 

She shapeshifted back to her original form and moved away from Umi, letting Tsubasa take her place. 

“Maybe I should take your ability when I’m done with you.” Tsubasa smirked, reaching up. She unbuttoned the top button of Umi’s shirt and began to slowly make her way down, unfastening them one by one. “It would be ironic to kill your precious friends with your ability. Maybe I’ll kill the invisible girl with it. Minami Kotori, wasn’t it?”

Umi gritted her teeth, tears prickling at her eyes. She refused to answer, not wanting to show any weakness. Begging would get her nowhere with these three. She had to appear strong even when she was weak. “Just go to hell.”

“Oh, I will.” 

Erena watched in amusement as Tsubasa pushed Umi’s shirt open, causing the girl to cringe. It was funny that she used to be in Umi’s shoes. Always the one disobeying orders and being tortured. She’d been soft then but no more. “Moron should just stop fighting.”

Tsubasa glanced at Erena, giving a slight nod of agreement. Turning back to Umi, she unsheated her knife and pressed it to the girl’s abdomen. “What do you say, Umi? Should I just finish it?” She pressed the knife closer, causing Umi to wince. “You would like that, wouldn’t you?”

“I-I’ll do as the government says.” Umi rasped out, trying to calm her racing heart. She couldn’t die. If she did there would be nobody to keep Honoka safe. “I’ll do whatever they want.”

Tsubasa chuckled darkly and drew back the knife, leaving a thin cut, oozing blood. “Good girl.”

\-------

A week later.  
Honoka watched anxiously from near the doorway as Kotori hurriedly packed a bag full of the few items of clothing she had left. To Honoka’s panicked mind it looked like she was packing everything she had, like she wasn’t going to come back. “Please don’t go, Kotori-chan. Please.”

Kotori didn’t dare look at Honoka. If she did she knew that she would agree to anything her girlfriend asked of her. “I have to go, Honoka-chan. I have to get Maki-chan, Rin-chan and Hanayo-chan back. We can’t just leave them.”

“It’s too dangerous! I’ll go instead. E-Eli-senpai will go with me. But you can’t go!” 

Kotori shook her head. “We both know it has to be me and Nico-chan. You’re still recovering. Nozomi-chan would be defenseless and Eli-chan is...her ability is too obvious. I have to go.”

She stood up and slung her backpack over her shoulder. She made her way to the door only to be stopped by Honoka getting in her way. 

“I-I won’t let you.” Honoka stuttered nervously, her hands trembling at her sides. “You’ll have to go through me first.”

Looking up in surprise, Kotori found Honoka’s eyes damp with tears. “You know I would never hurt you, Honoka-chan. But I can get past you if I need to.”

“I don’t want you to go.” Honoka said, her voice breaking mid sentence. “What if something happens to you? I can’t lose you too, Kotori-chan. I-I love you. Please, I…”

Kotori stepped forward and wrapped her arms around Honoka, hugging her tightly. To her surprise, Honoka didn’t flinch away. She melted into her embrace, a sharp sob passing her throat. 

“I’ll be back.” Kotori promised in a whisper, holding Honoka close to her. “I’ll always come back for you, Honoka-chan.” She kissed Honoka’s cheek before she broke away from her and left the room. 

Honoka stared out of the window of her ‘bedroom’ down at the desolate street below. It had been two days since Kotori and Nico had left and there was no sign of them yet. 

“They’re not coming back.” She mumbled to herself, the words sending a stab of panic through her chest. “They’re not coming back.”

She heard the door open behind her but she didn’t bother to look over. It would be Nozomi or Eli, coming to check on her. They’d been doing that a lot since Kotori had left. More often than not Eli would spend the night with her, trying to soothe her to sleep. Her dreams were riddled with nightmares though.

She felt warm arms go around her from behind and she tensed automatically, just for a moment before she slowly relaxed. She knew it was only Eli. She felt a twinge of pain as Eli’s head pressed against the seering mark on her back. She hadn’t told anyone about it but feeling Eli’s head resting lightly against it calmed her down. She took a shuddering breath, focusing on the warmth surrounding her. 

“She’s not coming back.” She finally whispered. 

“She will.” Eli whispered, giving Honoka a gentle squeeze. “She’ll be back in a couple of days. She told you this mission might be a long one. If something was wrong we’d know it. Nozomi would know. Trust me, Honoka. Kotori is fine.”

“How can you know that?!” Honoka blurted out, turning quickly in Eli’s arms to face her. She flinched back slightly when it brought their faces a little too close. “I-I’m sorry, I…I just want Kotori-chan back. I don’t have anyone else. She’s...Umi-chan is gone and I-I don’t know what to do.”

Eli hesitated for a moment before speaking. “You...you have me, you know. And Nozomi and Nico. You have all of us.”

Honoka sighed, her shoulders slumping. “I want Kotori-chan, I just...don’t know how to tell her that.She thinks I don’t trust her. M-Maybe that’s part of the reason she left. Maybe it’s my fault.”

“It’s not.” Eli gently drew Honoka back to her, hugging her tightly. “I know it’s not.”

\------

“Are you sure this is the place?” Kotori asked nervously as she glanced around. She could barely see, given that it was so late but they’d had little choice but to carry out the mission in darkness. It was safer that way. If CORPS were around being under the cover of night would give them both the element of surprise and another way for them to approach undetected. “How did you find out about this place anyway?”

“Yes. And I have my ways.” Nico answered mysteriously, her voice hushed. She gripped Kotori’s hand tighter. She’d been holding onto it in case Kotori needed to use her ability to turn them both invisible. She was certain CORPS weren’t surrounding the small hotel. “Shhh.”

Kotori fell silent as they approached the outside entrance to a basement of some kind. Her heart seized in her chest as Nico let go of her hand but she watched as the older girl moved forward, throwing the doors open. 

“I hear voices.” Nico whispered, feeling Kotori step close to her back. “Come on, let’s go.”

Kotori followed Nico down the old stairs into the basement and to her surprise found herself in what seemed to be a makeshift hospital. There were a couple of beds around the room and Kotori caught sight of a couple of teens she didn’t recognize. They seemed to be injured, receiving treatment for something. 

Nico tugged Kotori through the basement, her mind set on finding the first years. That was what they’d come there for. “Let’s just find them and get out of here.”

“R-Right.” Kotori said, glancing back at the two teens. She wondered if they knew each other. It didn’t seem like it. In fact it didn’t seem like they were even related to the hotel at all. They hadn’t asked any questions when Nico and Kotori had burst in after all. 

“There!” Nico exclaimed, pointing to a bed in the far corner. There seemed to be far more beds than there were people to sleep in them. It seemed that whoever was in charge must have dragged them down from upstairs. She hurried over, catching sight of the girl in the bed as she approached. “Rin? What the hell happened to you?”

“Nico-chan!” Rin exclaimed, her eyes widening with surprised happiness. Next to her, Hanayo whirled around too. “What are you doing here, nya?!”

“Y-You two are alive.” Hanayo stuttered, tears filling her eyes as she stared at the two of them. “Maki-chan couldn’t connect to any of you! She lost contact with Kotori-chan a-and we thought…” She looked at Kotori, shaking her head. “We thought you were gone. Maki-chan thought...she didn’t understand why she couldn’t reach you.”

Kotori looked around, hoping to see a familiar flash of red hair. “Where is she?” She rasped, her stomach sinking with dread as she turned back to Hanayo and Rin. “Where’s Maki-chan?”

Rin sat up, wincing as she did so. Her leg was still bothering her but she supposed it didn’t help that she’d rebroken it before it could heal. “She’s treating so-” She was cut off by the sound of an instrument tray hitting the floor. 

“Koto-nee?!”

Kotori turned around, her eyes widening at the sight of Maki. Nico on the other hand frowned at the odd nickname. 

“Maki-chan!” Kotori exclaimed, relief seeping into her voice. “You’re okay!”

Nico watched in bemusement as the two of them moved at the same time, colliding in a fierce hug in the middle of the room. She shook her head slowly. She didn’t know what was going on with those two. 

“I-I thought you were dead.” Maki whispered tearfully into Kotori’s shoulder. “I-I could connect with you one minute and the next you were gone! I thought the virus...y-you were too close, you would have been caught in the fog.”

“I’m here.” Kotori closed her eyes tightly as she spoke, her voice clogged with emotion. “I was caught in it, with Nozomi-chan. It weakened us and made us sick but Nico-chan gave us her blood.”

Maki felt a sob burst free from her throat. “So many people have died. Or been captured. I can’t save anyone.”

“You have. You saved Rin and all of these other people.” Kotori hurried to reassure Maki as she girl cried softly against her shoulder. “Come on, Maki-chan. Don’t cry, you know it just makes me cry too.”

“S-Sorry.” Maki slowly drew away, snifflinf softly but she kept her hands on Kotori’s arms for a moment, not wanting to let go. 

Nico rolled her eyes. “I’m alive too by the way.”

“Nico-chan!” Maki blushed and quickly let go of Kotori, stepping back. “A-Anyway, what are you both doing here?”

“We came to get your sorry asses.” Nico said bitterly. “Pack up, we have to get back. You’ve missed a lot.”

“I can’t!” Maki exclaimed in alarm. She turned to Kotori, her eyes wide. “I can’t leave these people, Koto-nee. I can’t!”

“What the hell are you calling her?” Nico snapped, shaking her head. “Do you know how long I’ve spent looking for you? Show some damn gratitude and get your stuff together. We need you back there.”

“I’m coming, nya.” Rin got off the bed with Hanayo’s help, holding one foot off the ground. She leaned against her best friend, mumbling an apology for being such a burden. 

“Good. You too?” Nico looked to Hanayo who gave a hesitant nod. Relieved, she turned to Maki. “You’re staying?”

Maki nodded silently. 

“That’s too bad. We could have really used you after what happened with Honoka.” Nico pointed out, raising an eyebrow. 

“What happened to Honoka?!” Hanayo asked quickly, clearly alarmed. 

“I’ll tell you on the way.” Nico slid herself under Rin’s other arm to help her walk and started toward the door. 

“W-What happened to Honoka?” Maki asked shakily, locking eyes with Kotori. “Is she okay?”

“Um…” Kotori glanced toward Nico. “I-I shouldn’t leave her for too long. She’s...she’s sensitive at the minute.”

“What do you mean?!” Maki’s voice rose in frustration. “What happened to her?”

“She was captured and taken to a camp. She was there for months before we got her out. Umi-chan stabbed her just before she escaped and we barely managed to save her in time.” Kotori explained hurriedly, conscious of the fact that Nico was leaving without her. “Now she’s...scared all of the time. She won’t go outside and she hates being alone but she barely lets us touch her either. I-I’m sorry, Maki-chan. I have to get back. You won’t come with me? Nico-chan is right. Honoka-chan needs you.”

“I’ll have to bring them. I can’t just leave them.” Maki gestured to the other occupants of the room. “I only have six patients at the minute but they have nowhere to go.”

“Nico-chan is going to kill me.” Kotori muttered, glancing after Nico. “Fine. You can bring them if you want. I have to go and tell Nico-chan to wait though.”

“Thanks, Ko…” Maki trailed off as Kotori hurried off after Nico. “Guess she’s pissed at me too.”

She brushed the thought off, hurrying to get the other ability users ready to move.

\-----

Eli and Honoka were huddled together in Honoka’s futon when the door to the bedroom opened. 

Eli, who had been on the verge of sleep, looked over her shoulder and smiled faintly at the sight of Nozomi. “Hey. I don’t think I’m coming to bed tonight. I don’t want her to be alo...is everything okay?”

“I can feel Kotori-chan and the others.” Nozomi whispered, pressing her hand to her chest. “Maki-chan, RIn-chan and Hanayo-chan too. They’re on their way.”

Eli felt a wave of relief wash over her. “Good. I’ll tell Honoka when she wakes up if they’re not back by then.”

Nozomi watched as Eli turned back to Honoka, gently brushing her hair back from her face. “They’re bringing other ability users. Patients, I think. They all seem hurt in some way.”

Eli frowned but finally shrugged. “If they want to get to Honoka they’ll have to go through me first.”

Nozomi nodded in understanding though she knew Eli couldn’t see her. “I’ll have Maki-chan take a look at Honoka when she gets back. Her wounds need to be checked.”

“Alright.” Eli mumbled, laying her head back on her pillow. 

Nozomi moved forward, kneeling down next to Eli and placed a gentle hand on her arm. “Something’s on your mind. What’s wrong?”

Eli sighed and carefully turned onto her back to look up at Nozomi. “I can’t believe she just left her like this.”

“You’re angry with Kotori-chan.” Nozomi murmured in realization. 

“That’s an understatement.” Eli lifted her hand, running it over her face. She was exhausted but she wasn’t sure she’d be getting any sleep now that she knew Kotori was coming back with the others. “She’s going to come back and act like she never left. She’s going to expect to be the person in this position again. Honoka needs someone she can depend on.”

“You sound jealous, Elichi.” Nozomi teased lightly. “Are you sure there’s nothing I need to know?”

“It’s not that.” Eli shook her head, frowning. “I just think Honoka deserves better, that’s all.”

Nozomi didn’t reply to that. She could see where Eli was coming from but she didn’t want to say anything against Kotori at the same time. She kissed Eli’s cheek, mumbling a goodnight before she left the room. 

\------

It had been days since Honoka had left her bedroom but when Kotori entered she had ran from the room, down the stairs and into Kotori’s arms, hugging her tightly. Kotori had seemed surprised, pleasantly so, to get such a greeting from her girlfriend.

After everything was explained and Maki’s patients were introduced to everyone, the group had slowly dispersed, leaving Nozomi, Eli, Nico, Kotori, Maki and Honoka in the living room of the house. 

Maki was staring at Honoka, eyeing the bandages she could see creeping up from below the girl’s shirt. As much as she wanted to check on the wound to make sure it wasn’t infected it seemed that Honoka didn’t want to let go of Kotori. 

Rin and Hanayo had gone up to one of the rooms, having declared that they would need to rest after the trip. Rin especially needed to take the weight off of her leg. 

Maki glanced at Eli, noticing she was staring at Kotori and Honoka with an odd look on her face. She seemed to be both annoyed and concerned about something though it was obvious she was trying not to say anything. 

“Honoka.” Maki spoke up finally, looking back to their leader. The tension was getting to be too much for her and the thought of how long it had been since Honoka’s badnages had been changed was bothering her. “Can I change your bandages for you in the kitchen? Please?”

“Um…” Honoka glanced at Eli for reassurance and received a gentle smile in response. “Y-Yeah, I guess.”

Kotori’s gaze followed Honoka and Maki out of the room, her brow furrowed in concern. It had taken Honoka a long time to be comfortable around her once more. Around Eli too. She couldn’t help but worry that being around someone she hadn’t spoken with in a while would panic Honoka. 

“How was you trip then?” Eli’s voice dripped with sarcasm as she spoke.

“Elichi.” Nozomi warned warily. 

Kotori looked toward Eli, finding the blonde looking directly at her. “What do you mean by that? It was fine. We found Maki-chan, Rin-chan and Hanayo-chan.”

“How could you just leave her here?” Eli asked, her tone clipped as she glared at Kotori. “She told me that she begged you to stay and you didn’t listen to her. She was terrified that you weren’t coming back, you know. She had nightmares every night. That Umi would somehow get to you.”

“Did you not want to find the others?!” Kotori’s face flushed red with annoyance. “We’re a team, we have to stay together. Nico-chan had a lead and we had to follow it.”

“You didn’t have to go. You could have stayed here with her. Anyone could have replaced you on that mission. I could have or Nozomi could have but you were so desperate to get away you took the first chance, didn’t you?” Eli pointedly questioned. 

“I-I was the last in contact with Maki-chan. I HAD to go!”

“Like hell you did!” Eli exclaimed sharply, sitting up straighter in her seat. She gripped the arm of the couch. “Anyone else could have gone with Nico. She would have been just as safe going on her own.”

Kotori gritted her teeth. “We both committed ourselves to this mission. We had to follow it through.”

“It’s too bad you’re not as committed to your girlfriend.” Eli commented harshly. She felt Nozomi reached out, squeezing her arm. “Don’t worry, I’m done. I’m going to my room. Honoka knows where I am if she needs me.”

Kotori growled under her breath at the pointed look Eli shot her but she let the blonde leave. “Damn it.” She looked up at Nozomi. “I guess you agree with her?”

Nozomi shrugged. “She has a point. If Honoka’s...problems are making you feel trapped or like you need to back away there’s no shame in that. But Elichi won’t see it that way. She has a...connection with Honoka. She feels like she owes her a lot.”

Kotori sighed and got up, walking toward the kitchen as her stomach churned with guilt. Maybe she shouldn’t have gone after all. She paused in the doorway, seeing Maki standing in front of a shirtless Honoka. 

“I’ll be gentle.” Maki promised softly as she gripped the corner of the bandage. She waited for a nod before she slowly began to peel the bandages away. “If you want me to stop, just say so.”

“I-I’m fine.” Honoka said shakily as Maki finished taking the bandages off. 

“You’re shaking.” Maki disagreed in a whisper. She gently touched Honoka’s arm only for the girl to flinch away. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”

Honoka shook her head, her lower lip trembling slightly. “I-I don’t like people touching me t-too much anymore. Just Kotori-chan and Eli-senpai…I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. I’ll try to do this without touching you.” Maki murmured understandingly. She waited for a nod of consent before she went back to what she was doing, examining the wound before she began to rebandage it. 

“I-I was worried about you.” Honoka stuttered, trying not to give into the panic niggling at her. It was only Maki. “Kotori-chan and the others were too.”

Maki looked up in surprise. “She wa...I mean you were?”

Honoka nodded without hesitation. “I-I only got here two weeks ago s-so I didn’t know you were missing but I-I missed you. All of you.”

Maki bit the inside of her cheek. “I missed you too. I’m sorry I-I wasn’t here sooner.” Her voice cracked and she cleared her throat. “Can I hug you? Is that okay?”

Honoka hesitated for a moment before nodding. As Maki leaned in and hugged her she closed her eyes and tentatively hugged back. She didn’t feel as comfortable hugging anyone else as she did Kotori and especially Eli but she wasn’t surprised. 

Maki pulled away after a moment, hurriedly swiping at her eyes. “Let’s get you dressed. You have to change these bandages daily to keep the wound clean, okay? I can help you if you want.”

“I-I’ll ask Eli-senpai. Thank you, Maki-chan.” Honoka accepted the shirt Maki handed back to her and quickly tugged it on. “I should get back to Kotori-chan…”

Kotori ducked away from the doorway, heading quickly upstairs so Honoka wouldn’t realize she’d been listening. 

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

“Uh...come in.” Maki called, hearing someone knock at the door to her bedroom. She supposed she was fortunate in the sense that the house the group had found was quite spacious, meaning she’d been able to request her own room. She didn’t mind sharing with Rin and Hanayo but she liked to have her own space at times and so did they, if they were honest.    
  
The door opened and she was surprised to see Kotori slip into the room, closing the door quietly behind her. “Oh, hey. What’s um...what’s going on?”   
  
“I thought I would come and see if you need anything before I go to bed.” Kotori said innocently. She relented at the skeptical look Maki shot her. “Eli is with Honoka.”   
  
“Sleeping with her?”   
  
“No, just...I don’t know, Honoka-chan said she’s used to Eli being there when she falls asleep now or something.” Kotori said with a shrug of her shoulders. She walked over to Maki’s bed and sank down onto it with a soft sigh. “Is it okay if I stay in here for a while?”   
  
“Yeah, s-sure.” Maki answered, moving along a bit on the bed to give Kotori some space. She noticed Kotori looked a little bit downcast. “Are you okay?”   
  
Kotori forced a smile. “I’m fine.”   
  
“You don’t look fine.” Maki was blunt but she kept her voice gentle so as not to come off as annoyed. “What’s going on?”   
  
“Nothing gets past you, huh Maki-chan?” Kotori smiled weakly though as she continued it slipped away. “I just feel like Honoka-chan is distant. She hardly lets me touch her and now it seems like she just wants to spend time with Eli-chan.”   
  
“W-Well I guess it’s because you’ve been gone.” Maki offered nervously. She hardly thought she was the best person to offer advice about anything. “Eli must have been there a lot for her. But she does want you. Of course she does.”   
  
Kotori bit her lip, glancing toward Maki. “How do you know? Maybe Eli-chan is right, maybe I’m selfish. I shouldn’t have left, I just wanted…”   
  
Maki waited with baited breath for Kotori to finish her sentence. She didn’t though. “Wanted what?”   
  
“I wanted you safe. You and Rin-chan and Hanayo-chan. We thought you were dead.” Kotori answered softly. She reached out, touching Maki’s hand to reassure herself. “When I couldn’t contact you, I was so worried. I thought you...I didn’t think I’d get to speak to you again.”   
  
“I thought that too. About you.” Maki glanced briefly down at their hands before she looked up at Kotori again. “I was so happy when I saw you, I just wanted to…”   
  
“Wanted to what?” Kotori said, her voice taking on a slightly teasing tone. She knew it was difficult for Maki to show affection for people but it was endearing that she was trying. She leaned in slightly, a slight smile tugging at her lips. “Come on, Maki-chan. You can tell m-”   
  
Maki surged forward, closing the small amount of distance between herself and Kotori and kissed the older girl. She couldn’t help it, not with Kotori so close to her. Clutching Kotori’s arms, she felt her try to pull away for just a second before she relaxed and kissed her back.    
  
Maki’s lips parted slightly from Kotori’s but the second year was quick to kiss her again. Maki pressed Kotori back onto the bed and moved on top of her, straddling her waist. Her breath hitched as she felt Kotori’s tongue press against her lips. She parted them, letting Kotori deepen the kiss. Having relaxed her grip on Kotori’s arms she felt hands move to her lower back, not before gliding up over the back of her thighs. Her body suddenly felt oddly hot and overly sensitive to Kotori’s touch.    
  
Shakily, she let her hand drift to the hem of Kotori’s shirt. Her fingers slipped under it but as soon as they came into contact with soft, warm skin she felt Kotori’s hand disappear from her back. Her arms were suddenly gripped and she found herself firmly pushed away.    
  
Maki froze as she met Kotori’s wide, worried eyes. “I-I didn’t mean to, I…”   
  
“W-We can’t do this.” Kotori said, her voice shaky. “I can’t do this to Honoka-chan. She’s already been through enough. I can’t…” She lightly pushed Maki off of her and got up from the bed. Her cheeks blazed red. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have kissed you back. I didn’t mean to.”   
  
Maki swallowed thickly. “But you did. You did kiss me back so you wanted to, right?”   
  
“I-It doesn’t matter!” Kotori exclaimed, stepping away. “It just can’t happen again. I-I have to get back to Honoka…”   
  
Maki’s shoulders slumped as Kotori turned and hurried out of the room. She felt a flare of anger toward Honoka but then she remembered how happy Honoka had looked to see her and her anger was immediately replaced with guilt.    
  
“Fuck.” She cursed, going into her pocket. She pulled out a cigarette and set it between her lips. Just as she lit it the door opened again and Nico walked in. “What do you want?”   
  
Nico paused, a bit taken aback. “I just came to check on you. What’s going on?”   
  
“I’m fine.” Maki said bluntly, noticing Nico eyeing the cigarette. “Don’t say anything. I don’t need you to lecture me about how I’m meant to be training to be a doctor and I should know better than smoking. Hanayo already went through it with me.”   
  
“I wasn’t going to say anything.” Nico crossed her arms in front of her chest. “What’s wrong with Kotori? She almost ran right into me when she left.”   
  
Maki shrugged her shoulders.    
  
“Are you ever going to tell me the truth about what’s going on with you two?”   
  
“Nope.”   
  
Nico sighed and walked over to Maki, taking the cigarette from her mouth. She nipped the end and put it into her pocket. “Focus on me. No smoking, alright? What are you, sixteen? How long have you even been doing this?”   
  
Maki nodded. “Three months. Since they released the virus.”   
  
Nico shook her head in exasperation. “You shouldn’t be doing this to yourself. You’ll make yourself sick.”   
  
Maki shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t care.”   
  
“You should care.” Nico sat down next to Maki and gently nudged her. “You’re not going to tell me what’s going on with you then? Is it about Kotori?”   
  
“I don’t want to talk about it.” Maki reached out and gripped Nico’s hand, hard. “Where are you sleeping tonight?”   
  
Nico’s face flushed at the question. It wasn’t said suggestively at all but she imagined it that way. “Um...I don’t know. Maybe with Rin and Hanayo. They’re in the room I was sleeping in so...”   
  
“Can you sleep with me?” Maki blurted out. “I just...need something. Smoking or someone to...be with. And you won’t mind, right? It’s not like you even feel it.”    
  
Nico quickly looked away, hoping the sharp twinge of hurt she’d felt didn’t show on her face. “You should do it with someone you care about, don’t you think?”   
  
Maki blinked in confusion. “What? I just meant sleep with me, like...let me hug you and I-I don’t know, maybe cry if I need to. I just thought that you can’t feel anything so you would be able to ignore me if I’m...emotional. Did you really think I meant  _ sex?!” _   
  
“Well you should have worded it better!” Nico exclaimed, flustered. “It’s not as though I want to anyway!”   
  
 Maki raised an eyebrow. “Well you’re eighteen so it’s a given…”   
  
“Shut up, Maki!” Nico growled irritably. “Look I’ll do whatever you want, okay?”   
  
“Fine. Hug me then.”   
  
“Seriously?!” Nico exclaimed skeptically.    
  
“Well if it’s out of your element…”   
  
“Just move over you big baby.” Nico sighed and waited for Maki to move, lying down facing away from her. She hesitated before she moved up behind Maki and wrapped her arms around her. “There. Happy?”   
  
“This is...wrong.” Maki turned over in Nico’s arms, bringing their faces inches apart. “Turn over.”   
  
Nico sighed but did as she was told. Feeling Maki’s arms go around her, she closed her eyes and focused on the warmth. It wasn’t something she felt often, given that she couldn’t feel other people touching her. “You’re gonna be the one thing that kills me…”   
  
“What?” Maki mumbled in confusion.    
  
“Nothing, just go to sleep.” Nico said quickly, her chest tight. She would never have Maki in the way she wanted her but she had come to accept that.    
  
“You really are my best friend, Nico.” Maki whispered into the silence.    
  
“Yeah, um...me too.” Nico said awkwardly, clutching the blankets to her chest.    
  
\-----   
  
As soon as Kotori walked out of Maki’s room she bumped into Nico, causing them both to stumble slightly. She muttered an apology but carried on walking, barely noticing that she almost bumped into Hanayo too. She made her way back toward the bedroom she was sharing with Honoka, only to be stopped by Eli stepping out of the bathroom in front of her.    
  
“Is Honoka-chan asleep?”    
  
“Yeah.” Eli’s brow furrowed as she noticed Kotori’s messy hair. “Looks like you’ve been busy.”   
  
Kotori quickly reached up to smooth down her hair as Eli nodded toward it. “Just what are you suggesting?”   
  
“Nothing.” Eli answered with a shrug.   
  
“Shouldn’t you be with Nozomi-chan?” Kotori asked, hoping to change the subject. “She is still your girlfriend, isn’t she?”   
  
Eli gritted her teeth for a moment. “Yes, she is. She understands that Honoka needs me right now though.”   
  
“Honoka-chan needs  _ me _ .” Kotori argued, more than a little bit annoyed with Eli’s attitude toward her since she’d gotten back. “I’m her girlfriend.”   
  
“Maybe you should try acting like it.” Eli quipped pointedly.    
  
“Ugh, you’re INFURIATING!” Kotori exclaimed loudly. “What the hell is your problem with me?”   
  
“My problem with you is that Honoka is your girlfriend and you don’t give a crap.” Eli growled before she turned on her heel.    
  
“Where are you going?”   
  
“To sleep next to Honoka.” Eli called back, lifting her hand in a wave. “Goodnight, Kotori.”   
  
“Where am I supposed to…” Kotori trailed off. Eli had already disappeared into her bedroom. “Damn it.” She turned to head down the hallway only to be once more stopped by another door opening further down. She was relieved to see Nozomi poke her head around the door.    
  
“You can sleep with me tonight.”   
  
“Thanks…” Kotori mumbled, walking over to Nozomi. She slipped into the room and cast a glance around. “At least you have a bed. Honoka-chan and I were sleeping on a futon.”   
  
Nozomi chuckled at that. “Sorry about Elichi. She can be...protective when it comes to Honoka-chan.”   
  
“Understatement.” Kotori muttered with a roll of her eyes.    
  
“You know, I feel a bit jealous watching them together too.” Nozomi said, sitting down on the bed. She noticed Kotori seemed hesitant to join her but she didn’t comment on it. “But it’s their bond. We just have to go with the flow, you know?”   
  
Kotori frowned. “I don’t want to.”   
  
“Why?”   
  
“Because...because I should be there for Honoka-chan. She needs me.” Kotori tried as best she could not to think about the kiss she had shared with Maki but it was impossible not to. “She’s my girlfriend, not Eli-chan’s!”   
  
“Eli is her best friend though.” Nozomi explained patiently. “Those two have a connection, you know that.”   
  
“So she’s trying to take Umi-chan’s place.” Kotori’s tone was sharp and filled with frustration. “She can’t do that. Umi-chan is Honoka-chan’s childhood friend, Eli-chan is just…”   
  
“Kotori!” Nozomi warned, her eyes narrowing slightly. “I want to help you. I really do but Elichi is my girlfriend. And she’s Honoka-chan’s senpai. Honoka-chan saved her and now she wants to save Honoka-chan. She’s only angry with you because she doesn’t understand how you could have left when Honoka needed you.”   
  
“She didn’t need me because obviously she had her!” Kotori snapped loudly in annoyance. “Maki-chan needed me. And Rin-chan and Hanayo-chan.”   
  
Nozomi shook her head in disdain. “You’re making excuses. Honoka-chan only wanted you before you left. You feel guilty for leaving her and you’re lashing out at Eli because of that.”   
  
Kotori opened and closed her mouth several times before finally shaking her head. “I need to get some sleep. I’ll talk to Honoka-chan tomorrow.”   
  
Nozomi didn’t say anything as Kotori moved past her, climbing on the bed. She got into the bed next to her, eager to go to sleep herself. “You know, I think it’s important to Honoka that you be nice to Elichi. She really cares about her.”   
  
Kotori didn’t respond.    
  
\-----   
  
Eli was surprised to find Honoka awake when she returned to her bedroom. She looked worried when Eli walked into the room but upon seeing her she visibly brightened. “Were you talking to Kotori-chan?”   
  
“Yeah. I was just telling her I want to stay with you for one more night. Is that okay?” Eli asked hopefully as she moved toward the futon. She realized with a hint of guilt that she hadn’t stopped to ask Honoka what she wanted before she’d made the decision for her.    
  
Honoka nodded in response and Eli breathed a sigh of relief as she got into the bed. As Honoka moved toward her she automatically opened her arms, accepting the girl into them. Over the past few nights it had become a natural position for the two of them.    
  
“I thought you would have wanted to get back to Nozomi-chan.” Honoka murmured, closing her eyes as she basked in Eli’s warmth. Her hand, resting on Eli’s lower back where her shirt had ridden up felt especially warm. “I’m not keeping you from her, am I?”   
  
“Of course not.” Eli answered with a confident shake of her head. She knew that Nozomi would understand why she needed to stay with Honoka. “Don’t worry abou-” She was cut off by a light knock at the door. Looking toward it she watched as it inched open. “Arisa?”   
  
“Nozomi-chan said you would be in here.” Arisa said as she inched into the room. “Yukiho-chan is already asleep.”   
  
Eli drew away from Honoka, sitting up. “Are you okay?”   
  
Arisa shrugged her shoulders. “I can’t sleep. I-I just keep thinking about everything that’s happened and I can’t sleep.”   
  
“Um…” Eli looked to Honoka, a hopeful look on her face. “Is it okay if she stays? If you want us to leave we can but I can’t leave her alone.”   
  
Honoka scoffed and ignored the question. She shuffled back and flashed Arisa a nervous smile. “Do you want to stay with us tonight, Arisa-chan?”   
  
“Can I?” Arisa’s eyes widened slightly. When Honoka nodded she moved over to the two of them, slipping into the futon between the two. It was a tight squeeze but the three of them managed to fit.    
  
“Try to get some sleep.” Eli whispered, gently stroking Arisa’s hair. She glanced up at Honoka, looking for any sign of panic but found none.    
  
Honoka lay her head on her pillow and reached over, placing her hand gently on Eli’s hip while at the same time tentatively holding onto Arisa. “If you have a bad dream you can wake us.” She told Eli’s younger sister. “You don’t need to deal with it alone.”   
  
Arisa was silent for a moment before she turned onto her side and hugged Honoka. “Thank you, Honoka-san.”   
  
Eli shivered at the light touch to her hip. Honoka’s hand was cooler than her skin, but pleasantly so. It soothed her, grounded her. She placed her own hand atop it, lightly rubbing the back of Honoka’s hand with her thumb. Seeing Honoka reassuring Arisa despite her own worries caused her heart to swell and Eli felt her eyes prickle, her throat tightening with emotion. She was lucky to still have Arisa, Honoka and Nozomi. The others too. “Honoka…”   
  
Honoka looked up, confused but smiled at the soft look on Eli’s face. She turned her hand over to hold onto Eli’s, gripping it tightly. Content with Eli holding her hand she managed to drift off within a few minutes.    
  
\------   
  
Honoka wandered into the spacious kitchen the next morning with Eli and Arisa right behind her. She hadn’t joined the others in a few days, having elected to stay in her room most of the time. She saw Rin, on her crutches, speaking to one of the new occupants of the house. She didn’t recognize him so she automatically shrunk away. Nozomi and Kotori were sitting at the table, Kotori’s head lowered while Maki and Hanayo were trying to help Nico cook. Nico herself was doing everything she could to stop them of course.    
  
“Maki, you’ll cause a fucking fire!” Nico exclaimed, trying to nudge Maki out of the way so she could finish cooking. “Hanayo, stop phasing the damn eggs!”   
  
“I’m just trying to make the omurice.” Hanayo complained with a frown as she looked down at the pan in her hand. It wasn’t going well up until then.    
  
“Damn it, get out! Both of you!” Nico moved behind Hanayo and guided her toward the table along with Maki. “We don’t have enough to waste. It’s bad enough we don’t have decent electricity!”   
  
The boy talking to Rin looked up. “I can shock it. My ability is electricity.” Rin looked at his head worriedly and he smiled. “Don’t worry, I feel much better after Nishikino-sensei treated me.”   
  
Maki shrugged her shoulders and looked away. “It was nothing.”   
  
“You’re so cool, Maki-chan.” Honoka piped up as she hesitantly moved toward the table.    
  
Kotori looked up in surprise. “Honoka-chan!” She quickly vacated her seat to let Honoka sit down. “Here, I’ll make you some tea.”   
  
“Thank you, Kotori-chan.” Honoka whispered with a small smile as she sat down. She missed Kotori glaring at Eli and Eli glaring right back. Feeling a hand on her shoulder she looked up to see the blonde in question standing there. As Eli leaned down, she felt her breath hitch in anticipation though she wasn’t sure why. Eli kissed Nozomi and Honoka was left with a feeling of disappointment.    
  
Kotori returned to the table a moment later, setting a steaming cup of tea in front of Honoka who mumbled her thanks and shuffled over in the seat to make room.    
  
Kotori was surprised by the offer but sat down, resting her hand atop Honoka’s knee. Her attention shifted to Maki as the girl tried to walk into the kitchen again. She blushed, realizing she was staring at Maki’s ass and quickly looked away. “Damn it…”   
  
“Why does Arisa get to help and I don’t?” Maki complained loudly as Nico forcibly turned her around and pushed her away. 

 

“Because unlike you, she doesn’t annoy me.” Nico growled irritably. “Now get out!”   
  
Maki huffed out a sigh and walked out of the room.    
  
“I didn’t mean out of the...whatever!” Nico shook her head and went back to what she was doing.    
  
Kotori relaxed slightly when Maki left. She didn’t feel like she could be in the same room as her anymore without feeling uncomfortable and guilty about what they had done.    
  
“What’s wrong with her?” Eli mumbled, her gaze following Maki out of the room.    
  
Nozomi shrugged her shoulders. She really wasn’t sure but she got the feeling that it had something to do with Kotori.    
  
Eli gave Honoka’s shoulder a gentle squeeze. “I’ll help you change your bandages after breakfast, okay?”   
  
Honoka looked up with a soft smile. “Thanks, Eli-senpai. But maybe we can do it before? My um...chest hurts a little bit.”   
  
Maki appeared in the doorway, a worried look on her face. “What did you say?”   
  
Honoka’s eyes widened in surprise. “N-Nothing. Eli-senpai’s going to help me change my bandages, right Eli-senpai?”   
  
Kotori gritted her teeth but she didn’t say anything. Nozomi was right. Honoka and Eli’s closeness was just something she was going to have to get used to, especially now that Eli was determined to help Honoka through what she was going through.    
  
“Come on.” Eli reached out and took Honoka’s hand, tugging her to her feet. “We’ll do it in my room.”   
  
“I hope that’s the only thing you’re doing with her in your room.” Kotori mumbled under her breath, jealousy overwhelming her.    
  
She noticed both Nozomi and Maki look at her in surprise but Honoka and Eli didn’t seem to have heard what she had said.    
  
Eli led Honoka out of the kitchen and they walked up the stairs in silence, their hands still grasping each other’s. They only let go when Eli ducked into the bathroom to get a first aid kit.    
  
“Sit down.” Eli nodded toward the bed when they reached the bedroom she shared with Nozomi. She followed Honoka to the bed, sitting down next to her. “Um...you’ll need to take your shirt off too.”   
  
Honoka took her shirt off without question, tossing it onto the bed. She watched as Eli’s gaze dipped down, flitting over her torso. She blushed, figuring Eli was looking at her scars. She’d gained a few when she’d been in the camp. “Ah, sorry, I-I should have told you. T-The doctors…”   
  
“What?” Eli blinked, finally seeing the scars Honoka had been referring to. Her eyes widened slightly. “Oh! I-It’s fine, you didn’t have to tell me anything. I didn’t notice them, I just thought...well I wasn’t thinking about the scars.”   
  
Honoka tilted her head slightly in confusion. “What were you thinking about?”   
  
“Your chest.” Eli answered somewhat bluntly before she could even think to lie about what she’d been staring at. “I mean you’re really pretty and I’m...of course I would look.”   
  
“You...you think I’m pretty?” Honoka looked down at herself but all she could see were the scars that marked her. “Even with these?”   
  
“You’re beautiful.” Eli said solemnly.    
  
Honoka blushed red, right to the tips of her ears. “I um...thanks.”   
  
Eli smiled, unused to seeing Honoka acting so bashful around her. “I’ll change your bandages. Is that okay?” She waited for a nod before she reached forward and peeled Honoka’s bandages from her skin as gently as she could. She set them aside and silently contemplated the wound for a moment. “It seems to be healing.”   
  
Honoka hummed but otherwise she stayed silent as Eli wrapped the wound with bandages once more. Her hands were warmer than Maki’s, she noticed as fingers grazed against her skin. They seemed softer too though Honoka had imagined that Maki would have had softer hands.    
  
She closed her eyes for a couple of minutes as Eli worked diligently at wrapping the wound. When the blonde was done, Honoka opened her eyes and noticed Eli had moved a little closer to her. She reached up, placing her hands on Eli’s shoulders and sighed at the warmth.    
  
“Eli-senpai is so warm.” Honoka mumbled, leaning forward into Eli. She leaned against her chest, resting her head on the girl’s shoulder. She felt Eli’s arms wrap around her and sighed softly as she was enveloped in the warmth she was quickly growing used to.    
  
Eli blushed as she tried to ignore every dirty thought that crossed her mind. She couldn’t help it though. Not with someone who looked like Honoka so close to her. Her shirt was only thin too so she could feel Honoka pressed against her, leaving little to the imagination. She took a deep breath, trying to tell herself to ignore her feelings. She’d had feelings for Honoka for some time but she’d been able to ignore them. She had Nozomi after all and though Nozomi knew about the feelings and didn’t mind, Eli still felt a little guilty that she had them.    
  
All she had to do was ignore the feelings she had. It wasn’t love. She loved Honoka of course but not in a romantic way. What she was feeling was just lust though it felt like it was more than that because she loved Honoka as a friend and she had a deep respect for her. That was what she told herself.   
  
“I’m going to miss you tonight.”   
  
Thankfully Honoka’s comment was enough to distract Eli from her thoughts. Her brow furrowed in confusion. “What?”   
  
“You’ll have to go back to your own room with Nozomi-chan.” Honoka answered with a slight shrug of her shoulders. She made no effort to draw away from Eli. “And Kotori-chan will come back to my room.”   
  
“I-I don’t have to.” Eli said quickly, not wanting to rush Honoka into anything she wasn’t comfortable with. She was sure Honoka had gotten used to her presence just as she had Honoka’s. “I can stay with you if you need me.”    
  
“Even if I start crying in the middle of the night like I did a couple of days ago?” Honoka asked embarrassedly. “Or I have nightmares?”   
  
“I don’t care. Whatever you need me for.” Eli said with a shake of her head. “I’m always going to be there for you, Honoka.”   
  
Honoka drew back slightly to look at Eli. She seemed to hesitate uncertainly for a moment, biting her lip. “We can’t. It’s not fair to Nozomi-chan or Kotori-chan. A-And maybe if you stay with me I won’t ever be able to sleep without you.”   
  
Eli smiled at Honoka’s light laugh. “We can go back to normal if you want but Nozomi understands that you need me. And Kotori should understand you too. My warmth soothes you, doesn’t it? And...nobody else can generate such heat.”   
  
She wasn’t entirely sure why the warmth that naturally emanated from her body due to her ability soothed Honoka, all she knew was that it did and that Honoka seemed to gravitate toward it.    
  
Honoka sighed once more and pressed closer to Eli, resting her head against her shoulder once more. “Kotori-chan won’t understand. She wants to help a-and maybe I should let her try. I want you too though. I don’t know what to do.”   
  
Eli thought for a moment, reaching up to gently stroke Honoka’s hair. “You know this is a big house. And there’s a room in the attic nobody really goes to. They all say it’s creepy and it’s not really a bedroom but we could make it one...if we ever need to stay together for the night. Nozomi-chan would understand if you need me so you can come to my room and ask me to leave with you whenever you want.”   
  
Honoka thought about that for a moment. “So it would be...our bedroom?”   
  
Eli nodded silently in response. She would have to get the kid with electricity powers to take a look at the room first. She was sure the lights didn’t work up there but she could make the room suitable for her and Honoka, she was sure.   
  
“Eli-senpai?” Honoka mumbled, distracted by the comforting warmth Eli’s body offered. “If I needed to stay there with you tonight…”   
  
“I’ll be there.” Eli promised in a whisper, giving Honoka a gentle squeeze. She would have to spend the day trying to make the small room upstairs inhabitable for the two of them but she was more than willing to, for Honoka.    
  
\----   
  
Maki has just lit her cigarette when she heard footsteps behind her. A second later a hand appeared in front of her face, plucking the cigarette from between her lips.    
  
Nico tossed it to the ground and stubbed it out with her shoe. “What the hell have I told you about that?”   
  
Maki sighed in disdain. “I’m doing it outside. I thought it would be fine.”   
  
Nico rolled her eyes. “You’re an idiot. That’s not why I told you not to do this anymore.” She gripped Maki’s arm and tugged her back to the house, ignoring the redhead’s protests.    
  
As Maki found herself being dragged past the living room her eyes briefly met Kotori’s but as quickly as they had Kotori looked away, focusing on the conversation she was having with Nozomi instead. Maki felt a stab of hurt at the gesture.   
  
Noticing the interaction, Nico stopped short and growled under her breath. “What the hell is your problem lately?”   
  
Kotori looked up to see Nico was looking directly at her. “What?”   
  
Nozomi winced, preparing herself for the argument that was about to break out.    
  
“You’ve been such a fucking pain in my ass this week.” Nico growled angrily. “Don’t hurt Maki because you can’t control your own emotions!”   
  
Kotori gaped at Maki. “Y-You told her?!”   
  
Maki’s eyes widened and she quickly shook her head. “No! I didn’t, I swear. I wouldn’t do that to you.”   
  
“Maki didn’t say shit!” Nico butted in. “She didn’t have to but I can be pretty observant when I want to be. Maybe I don’t know the specifics but I know that whatever you did hurt her.”   
  
Kotori stayed silent, her gaze fixed intently on Maki’s hurt eyes. “I didn’t do anything to her. What happened was complicated and I’m not going to say anything else about it but you have no idea what you’re talking about, Nico-chan.”   
  
“I know that whatever you did hurt her enough that she had to ask ME for a fucking hug because she was so damn upset!” Nico stepped further into the room, tugging Maki with due to their still joined hands. “A HUG, Kotori!”   
  
“I DIDN’T DO ANYTHING!” Kotori yelled, frustrated by Nico’s stubbornness. “It was just a damn kiss, okay?! It didn’t mean anything to either of us. Tell her, Maki-chan!”   
  
“Right. It didn’t mean anything.” Maki forced herself to say, shocked by Kotori admitting it had even happened. “A-And it was my fault. I kissed her first, Nico-chan.”   
  
“But she kissed you back, didn’t she?!” Nico demanded, glancing between Maki and Kotori. “You shouldn’t have led her on, Minami! If you didn’t want to kiss her you shouldn’t have, she’s only…”   
  
“I did want to!” Kotori exclaimed, her hands clenched into fists at her sides. “You don’t understand. I thought she was dead and then she was right in front of me, telling me she’d missed me and OF COURSE I wanted to kiss her!”   
  
Maki stared at Kotori with a stunned expression on her face. “Kotori…”   
  
“We’re going.” Nico turned and dragged Maki toward the stairs. She took them two at a time, not stopping until she reached Maki’s bedroom. “Don’t listen to her, do you hear?”   
  
Maki nodded slowly. “I-It doesn’t change anything. I would never do anything to hurt Honoka. And she definitely wouldn’t. She loves her, e-even if she’s attracted to me. That’s all it is, right? It’s just physical?”   
  
Nico shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know. I guess.”   
  
\-----   
  
Nozomi let out a low whistle as Nico and Maki left the room. “Boy, you’re in your own love triangle, aren’t ya?”   
  
Kotori sighed and leaned back into the couch. “More like a love hexagon…”   
  
“Glad I’m not in it.”   
  
Kotori looked over at Nozomi. “How are you so calm about Eli-chan and her...attraction to Honoka?”   
  
“I love her.” Nozomi shrugged her shoulders. “I want to see her happy, Kotori. And Honoka makes her happy. Besides, I don’t think you have to worry about anything happening between the two of them. Honoka loves you too, you know?”   
  
“I love her too.” Kotori said softly, looking down at her lap. “I-I don’t know how I feel about Maki-chan. I’m not sure it’s possible to be in love with two people at the same time. Not for me anyway.”   
  
“Maybe it has to do with your...connection.” Nozomi suggested, raising an eyebrow. “We spoke about it before this insanity. Before the virus was released. You told me Maki-chan was your childhood friend, remember?”   
  
“Maybe. I don’t know.” Kotori sighed and ran her hand over her face. “The point is I can’t be alone with her. I don’t want to cheat on Honoka-chan but you’ve seen Maki-chan! What if I...what if I jump her? I can’t believe I’m saying this…”   
  
Nozomi bit her lip. She wasn’t sure what she could say to make Kotori feel better about her feelings. “Well at least you have good taste.” She finally settled on with a shrug of her shoulders. “You obviously have a thing for redheads.”   
  
“Nozomi.” Kotori groaned and hung her head, at a loss. “What am I going to do?”   
  
“Sleep with her. Maybe Honoka won’t mind sharing.”   
  
“NOZOMI!”   
  
“Okay, okay. I’m thinking.” Nozomi took a moment to think about the dilemma while Kotori watched her in anxious silence. “Just…maybe stay away from her.”   
  
“Forever?!” Kotori gaped at Nozomi.    
  
“Well...I don’t think she’ll be any less hot in five years.” Nozomi shrugged her shoulders. “She’ll just keep getting hotter. Like Honoka-chan.”   
  
Kotori sighed at the thought. She wasn’t sure what she was going to do.    
  
“I’m just saying. One day she’ll have a lab coat and those tight scrubs and maybe even cool glasses.” Nozomi said, speaking out loud. She noticed Kotori frowning at her. “But...BUT Honoka-chan will be taller, stronger and so damned rugged.”   
  
Kotori’s shoulders slumped in defeat. There was no getting around the fact that she would have to distance herself from Maki if she was going to control herself around her. “I guess I’ll just have to avoid her.”   
  
“Just being alone with her.” Nozomi was quick to add. “You don’t want to piss Nicocchi off. At least be friendly toward Maki-chan when other people are around.”   
  
“Right.” Kotori resolutely nodded her head, relieved that she seemed to finally have a plan in place. “Thank you, Nozomi-chan.”   
  
Nozomi lightly patted Kotori’s shoulder, flashing her a small smile. “That’s what friends are for, Kotori-chan.”   
  
TBC


End file.
